Boys Rule

Perhaps I am hypersensitive because I just finished reading James Dobson's Raising Boys, which talked a lot about how boys are discriminated against in our society for, well, being boys. Little boys are told to sit still (physically impossible when you have a Y chromosome). be calm (again, not likely), and play quietly (yea right). Not all little girls are good at doing these things either, but sterotypically it seems to be much easier for girls to grasp these concepts (quiet, calm play) then boys. And it is not boys faults, they are genetically predisposed to being wild banshees. Ok, that is not a quote from Dr. Dobson, but is my own personal reflection. So today I took my 2 boys to play at a park this morning (it is 80+ degrees today!!!) and then we met some friends at Chick Fil A for lunch. Our friends just happen to have 3 boys in their family so yes, we were taking 5 little boys ages 7 months to 6 years into a crowded restaurant. The boys were really well behaved. They were not quiet by any stretch of the imagination but they didn't bother the other guests in the restaurant and eagerly ran into the play area after the nuggets, fries, and fruit were gone and the last drop of lemonade had been slurped up. Jessica and I went into the play area to watch the boys as it was pretty crowded in there. Mind you, not one other parent was inside the play area (per usual) but whatever, we were done eating so we were happy to supervise. So the boys joined forces with a couple other boys and were running around and "shooting" each other and racing up the stairs and down the slide. They were definitely being wild, which I don't love, but after assessing the situation it seemed as though all the kids in the play area, even Joe who was by far the youngest, were fine with the rowdy play so I decided to sit back and let it go. There was one little girl in the play area, maybe 4 years old, who kept coming in and out. She seemed to play fine when she was in there but did come in and out quite a bit. Well eventually her mother I am assuming came in and loudly announced that it was time for her to go because "all of the big boys were being WAY too rough." Please note that she said "boys" the way one might say insects, rodents, filth, dirt, etc. You get my point. At this point I look at my friend Jessica and tell her to breathe and count to 10. Jess is not known for her mild mannered temperment and she certainly is a fierce momma bear who will stick up for her cubs any day. Jessica said "oh my gosh. I am breathing fire and need to get out of here. I am seriously about to get in a fight with a lady...at a Christian restaurant...on Good Friday!" Ok, I added the Good Friday part but she did say the rest :) We left the play area, had ice cream cones, and brought Hayden, Ben's buddy and Jessica's oldest son, home with us to play the rest of the day. All ended well. The "high maintenance" mom took her whiney daughter (hee hee) and went home, the boys had no idea that they had ever been insulted and were just happy to play together and I should be working right now, but instead am still shaking over the (non)encounter with the random lady at ChickFilA. I wish I could have told her that my boys are sweet, kind, and Ben had actually tried to help her daughter up the stairs at one point. I wish I could have suggested that if she would have been sitting in the play area with her child she would have seen that it was the son of her friend she was eating with that actually took her daughter's head and shoved her face into the glass everytime the mom wasn't looking, which was often. I wish I could have told her that I didn't appreciate her talking about my son when I was sitting right there; if she had a problem with the play she should have been in the play area or asked the boys to stop being so rowdy, which in all honesty they really weren't being overly rowdy. I wish I could have told the woman that I am way too hard on my kids and demand insanely perfect behavior out of them so I am the first person to correct them when their behavior is inappropriate, especially in public. I wish I could have told the women that I didn't appreciate her passive aggressive behavior and though it is not her fault that I am the annoying type of person that will stew over her nastiness and let it ruin my day, darn her for ruining my day. Now I was absolutely the paranoid first time mom once myself who turned my nose up to the moms who let their kids run wild while they enjoyed sipping their coffee with friends, oblivious to the destruction occuring in the play area. But you know what I did? I took my kid home. I didn't feel it necessary to make snide remarks or belittle other kids in the process of our exit. I simply told Ben that there were too many big kids and it was time to go, we could come back and try again when it was less crowded. And for the record, I was certainly over this when Ben was 4 years old. Give me a break. Anyway. Just needed to vent and this seemed like a good place to do it since I am too big a wimp to tell the mean lady at ChickFilA how I felt about her comment. I will get over myself and get off my soapbox now. But boys, I owe you an apology for not sticking up for you today. You are so wonderful and God blessed me when he gave me two perfect little boys to spend my days with. I would never choose it any other way. I am so proud of you both, Ben and Joe Bug, and love you more than anything...every dirty, loud, wild, rambunctious, smelly, crazy inch of you both :)